How did these items
become part of my life’s
clutter to begin with?
On my desk are two
copies of the book,
Yoga for Pregnancy,
though I’ve never
been pregnant.
Both copies have
been borrowed
numerous times, always
returned with a one-line
Thank You scribbled
on a square sticky note.
Inside a long plastic storage
box of fabric remnants, snaps,
needles, thread, pins, bobbins,
Velcro and shoulder pads, I find a
saved Yoga Journal, whose feature
article is “Be Happier Than You Ever
Thought Possible.” Did I read it?
I can’t recall. I put it back.
Inside a red and black pocket
journal, there is only one – full
moon – entry reminding me that,
after chanting in the Kanon Room
with Cynthia and Maria Elena,
and with Dad’s photo on the altar,
I returned to the parking lot to find
my car’s windshield stunningly
covered with yellow jackets.
What did this mean?
Did Dad caution me
about yellow jackets?
Get stung by one?
Respect them?
Kill one? Wear one?
It felt like a good omen –
that mass yellow gathering
on my windshield – yellow
the color of sunshine, happiness,
joy, intellect and energy –
But the space between my
grief and tears came undone
in that private chanting
service that day. It was
both healing and unbearable.
As it is to recall.
That journal, with its
only entry, was tucked in
with all the mending
materials that I own.
Ahh –Yellow Jack – ets!
how did I not get this
until now?
Jack – is my Dad.
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